That you're searching for answers.
But I don't have them.
You didn't went through what I went through.
You didn't need God where you were standing.
You didn't need God where you are standing.
But I did.
And I still do.
Maybe God is an excuse.
A pathetic excuse of an entity that keeps me going on.
Just a whole vacuum of nothing that I held onto to get my life together.
A sorry excuse to all the things I've regretted upon.
Just a mop that I thought will clear all my sins.
A mindless excuse that someone is capable of loving me.
Just a ray of hope that I pray to when my world is breaking down.
So yeah.
Despite the whole world telling me He is not real, I do believe.
I didn't give my life because I was a sinner.
I didn't give my life because my whole world was tumbling down.
I didn't give my life out of regrets.
I didn't give my life out of my love.
I gave my life out of His love.
I gave my life out of faith.
How can I explain this?
That I believe.
I can't.
You can't find God through science.
You can't find God through philosophy.
You have to go through IT.
He has to let you.
When that time comes...
Come find me.
Because only then, I will have the answers :)
But now.
I don't have them.
Sorry :(
Labels: the life of a college queen bee
